What is Therapy?
When people think of therapy, they often envision sitting in a room crying their way through a box of tissues while the therapist writes notes and asks “How does that make you feel?” While yes, there are often tears, and yes, we may inquire about your emotions, this is not exactly what therapy should look like and certainly not every time.
Therapy at Serenity Psychology Inc. can look very different depending on what your goals are and what stage of therapy we are in. First, you will notice that we use the terms “Therapy” and “Psychologist.” This is very important, and you can read more about the difference services available out there on our blog.
Serenity Psychology services are always provided by Elicia Miller who is a registered Clinical Psychologist. Your first session will include a clinical interview in which Elicia gets to know who you are, your history, your family background, and your symptoms. This allows her to put together a case conceptualization – a picture of what is happening, why it is happening, and her plan for how to help you change it and reach your goals. After this first session, you will better understand yourself and what brought you to this point so that we can build a roadmap to get where you want to go. People do not just suddenly develop a challenge or mental health concern, it is always a result of the experiences they have had in their life blended with their particular constellation of personality and behavioral traits.
Some possible goals might include healing something from your past, changing current behaviors, or problem solving a relationship situation. It’s important to understand how your therapist sees people and what they think needs to change to bring about their goals to ensure you agree (See our blog posts on How to Choose Your Therapist and Our Theory on What Makes a Person).
After that first session your therapy with Elicia can be very different every time. With each session, you should walk away with greater self awareness, a tool to cope, or feeling like something huge has shifted in your life, perspective, or emotional world. Surprisingly, this can often involve very little talking, depending on the kind of therapy we are doing. There are three main approaches Elicia uses and each looks very different. Each one targets deep seated and long standing habits, emotions and behaviors so you can be your best self and live a vibrant, connected and joyful life.
Elicia specializes in helping people change things they never thought were possible and healing things that are blocking people from living their best, most fulfilled lives. Yes, she will give you tools to cope in the meantime, but she believes fundamentally that people can change permanently for the better so you don’t have to be stuck in a frustrating and repetitive cycle of coping and managing your emotional states, thoughts and behaviors. When we heal our past hurts and remove the blockages they make, we naturally move towards a state of well-being and our best selves. Elicia is not afraid to go to hard places with you so you will never be alone or get a pat answer of “just think happy thoughts and all will be well.” You will go through it together with support and empathy and of course, laughter and tears. On the other side of those hard things, the beautiful, joyful, vibrant life you have always dreamed of emerges naturally.
Often, Elicia sees people who have done a lot of talk therapy and have not found that talking things out helps them. In the therapeutic world, we talk about “Top Down” and “Bottom Up” approaches to healing. Top Down approaches are traditional therapy styles and what people usually think of. This is where the stereotype of just talking to a listening empathetic person comes from, such as a therapist or possibly a close friend or neighbor. This can be powerful if you have not felt heard, if you process out loud and come up with new insights for yourself, or if you are struggling to gain new perspective on your concern. This is the first beginning stage of therapy, especially if it is your first time.
Elicia finds that her clients are smart capable people who understand how they should think about things logically or how they should be behaving, but in real life situations, they are struggling to actually follow through. Often for these individuals, being told exactly what they should have been doing brings on feelings of shame and failure. What we are increasingly learning from the study of how human beings work is that the majority of what we think and how we behave comes from our subconscious mind and body/emotional reactions. These come from our life experiences and create knee-jerk reactions rather than cognitive decisions - or in other words from the “bottom up.”
“Trauma comes back to us as a reaction, not a memory.”
Many leading therapists now talk about an 80/20 rule where 80% of our beliefs, behaviors, emotions and relationship interactions come from the body and a mere 20% come from the mind. This is obviously if our therapy only targets how we think about things. This is why Elicia focuses primarily on Bottom Up approaches working with the body, emotional reactions, and healing our injury from past experiences. These include both EMDR and SP:
-
EMDR has recently gained some awareness and popularity but many people do not understand how it works.
This treatment has been around since 1987. It was developed by Dr. Francine Shapiro after the link between rapid eye movement (REM) during sleep/dreaming and the natural processing of our life events and experiences was discovered. When we go to bed at night and we start entering our deep phase of sleep (a.k.a. REM Sleep), key areas of our brain are activated and information from our experiences including thoughts, physical sensations and emotions are processed by our amygdala (our fear center) and our hippocampus (our emotional memory center). This area of the brain is referred to as our Limbic System and through this processing, the information is moved from this system into our long-term memory storage.
When we are exposed to traumatic experiences (whether “big T” Trauma like assaults or “small t” trauma like being embarrassed publicly), the experiences are too intense to process and they overload this limbic system. As a result, they remain unprocessed and create chronic messages to the body to remain distressed and the brain to remain negative and ruminative on beliefs or events that are linked to the event in question. This is believed to be why we suffer from chronic and repetitive nightmares with unprocessed trauma experiences.
In cases of acute or single event trauma, the brain has a very specific triggered reaction to situations that are similar to the trauma. In cases of ongoing and repeated trauma events (such as living in domestic violence, going to war, or working as a first responder), the entire body becomes chronically stuck in an alert and trauma reactive state that limits our ability to feel good emotions and think calmly. It can ultimately restrict our enjoyment of life to such a degree we may take it as our normal state of being.
Through the use of eye movements, bilateral sounds, and tapping movements, EMDR helps simulate the REM cycle and thereby processes the events that are stuck and moves them into our long-term storage where they no longer actively impact us. While it sounds strange and looks strange, this technique is often life altering, quick and permanent.
While we cannot erase your memories or undo the impact of these experiences, we can use neuroscientific principles to change your relationship with your memories and past experiences. People most commonly report that these memories no longer come to mind unless they choose to think about them, and then they often find it difficult to bring them up and their bodies no longer react to them. They become just a difficult fact of your life but they no longer affect you here and now.
You are in control of what reactions and difficulties are explored in your session. Elicia will ask questions to draw your attention to your inner world of experiences, thoughts, reactions, emotions, and body sensations. You may end up working with;
strong emotions (that have been suppressed or are overwhelming)
limiting beliefs (such as “I will never be good enough”)
trauma symptoms and memories (like flashbacks, panic or nightmares)
physical symptoms (like physical pain or a racing heartbeat)
EMDR works very well for changing deep seated beliefs such as being Stupid, Not Good Enough or Unsafe. It is also fantastic for healing past trauma whether it is chronic/longstanding or one large event that triggered your reactions. You can choose either a short type of EMDR for key moments or a life changing, in-depth experience for broader reaching effects.
Ask us more about how EMDR can help you!
-
Sensorimotor Psychotherapy is a treatment developed by Dr. Pat Ogden in the 80’s that has continued to gather ongoing scientific evidence of its effectiveness as a treatment framework. We are increasingly understanding that the “effects of trauma, neglect, and abusive or emotionally painful relationships with childhood caregivers are held in our nervous systems, posture, and movement habits as well as in unresolved painful emotions and limiting beliefs.”
To change these long-lasting effects, clients must mindfully explore how their body continues to keep these reactions stored and better digest and integrate them with their mind and cognitive processes. This process of sitting with and exploring these physical memories and undigested experiences results in reintegration and healing of your reactions so you are free to live your most adaptive and expressive life. This prevents going into automatic habits and being hijacked by your reactions despite the desire and knowledge to do things differently.
Underlying Principles:
Key to a SP approach are the principles of;
Organicity - people naturally move toward wellness under the right conditions
Unity- we are hardwired for connection and awareness of each other
Holism - the human mind, body and spirit are all complexly interwoven, and you cannot separate them or only deal with parts
Non-violence - therapy should produce an environment without judgement that promotes curiosity and being with your Psychologist in a supportive way, all interventions are offered as suggestions not demands or requests and you can always disagree or withdraw consent
Mindfulness and Presence - throughout the session you are simultaneously very closely attuned to your body, emotions and reactions and engaged as an observer of the same which gives an element of distance and ability to engage your thinking-self alongside your feeling-self
Relational Alchemy - the positive relationship with your Psychologist itself promotes healing as it serves as a representation of interpersonal relationships and an opportunity to have a supportive and caring response which can require your body’s perceptions of and interactions with others
Through these principles, SP draws on the natural wisdom of the body (posture, movement, and the nervous system) to tap into the innate drive in all of us to heal, adapt, and develop new capacities.
What does an SP session look like in practice?
SP takes place in your Psychologists office. You are in control of what reactions and difficulties are explored in your session. Your Psychologist will ask questions to draw your attention to your inner world of experiences, thoughts, reactions, emotions, and body sensations. You may end up working with;
“strong emotions (that have been suppressed or are overwhelming)
limiting beliefs (such as “I will never be good enough”)
trauma symptoms (like panic or nightmares)
physical symptoms (like physical pain or a racing heartbeat).”
Through your Psychologists guidance you will explore and gain insight from your body’s reactions to help you resolve issues and meet your goals. Part of exploring and resolving these stuck reactions in your body is engaging in small thought, movement or relationship exercises or “experiments” to give your body new awareness or experiences that will be healing. This may include being respectfully touched by your Psychologist or engaging in physical exercise such as running on the spot or pushing on objects or noticing what happens when your Psychologist moves closer or further away. This is why this approach is often referred to as “body oriented” or “bottom up” therapy as it can unlock reactions that are deeply held, subconscious, and automatic that typical talk therapy cannot access or treat.
Experiments are always offered as suggestions prior to occurring and you can always decline or tell your Psychologist if something does not feel right or comfortable.
Come experience something new and empowering to unlock the ability to respond the way you want to rather than the way you always have.